Wannabe Balanced Mom

Crystal Escobar

· in Inspiration· Life of a Wannabe· List's and Schedules

Discovering Who We Are

This is the time of year we get to celebrate all the Pisces out there, myself included. Wahoo! Can’t believe I’m going to be 35, WHAT???? When did this happen? Well as I mentioned on Periscope a couple days ago, I just realized that I achieved a goal I set for myself. About 5 years ago I announced here on the blog that I wanted to write a book before I turned 35. Well guess what!? I wrote a book!!!!

Okay, well it’s not exactly the kind of book I had in mind but I decided to make it count anyway. I made a little instruction manual on how to make fermented foods and also about sprouting and cleansing. So I was pretty excited when I figured out how to do this AND how to make it available on Amazon. If you have a book on Amazon you officially gain the title of “Published author” right? Well if you disagree then please don’t burst my bubble. I like feeling all smart and sophisticated.

So the book is $5 free shipping for prime members, but trust me, I aint gettin rich off this.  I think I get like less than $1 for each book sold, but that’s okay. My purpose in writing a book is not to make money. I’m just trying to share what I know in hopes to help others.  The process of self discovery and how we can help others do the same provides great fulfillment in life.

So now let’s talk about the Pisces horoscope. It’s funny, because everything that my horoscope told me, seemed to be VERY comforting, and in fact answered many of my questions.

My NEEDS as a Pisces, is: A purpose, so as to focus thoughts and avert boredom. Quiet intervals, to foster a sense of identity and peace. To feel ENCOURAGED, trusted and loved. Pisces needs to stick to a schedule or they’ll get lost in their own dreams. Too much regimentation, however, will crush their creativity.

I mean seriously! This is exactly what I’ve been struggling with lately. Being TOO regimented and not allowing God and creativity into my life. I was just too busy following my schedule. So a few months ago I threw out my “to do” lists and schedules was so liberating. But then I just craved ROUTINE. So now I’m just trying to find the balance between routines and “fly by the seat of my pants”. Ugh, it’s that word again, BALANCE… the unattainable goal. One day y’all… I’m gonna find that balance I so desperately need in my life.

“THE TRUTH SHALL MAKE YOU FREE” John 8:32
Horoscopes and patriarchal blessings are very interesting. If you choose to believe them, it unwraps the truth about ones self, and in a sense, setting us free to do MORE with the gifts/ talents we’ve been given. It enhances faith in our own abilities, giving us the reassurance that, YES, we are special, and even GOOD at certain things. It gives us affirmations of what we can ultimately become, and perhaps unveiling the hidden obstacles holding us back.

RISING ABOVE 
I laughed when I read in my horoscope that I NEED to feel encouraged 🙂 I’ve noticed that about myself and I believe it’s a weakness. It holds me back a little in life, provoking me to second guess myself A LOT!  I remember when I first started telling people I wanted to serve an LDS Mission. People literally laughed, thinking I was joking.  This caused me to really doubt my abilities and think maybe I was fooling myself at thinking I could ACTUALLY do something like this. I knew I had to rise above the negative comments and go forth with my endeavor. It’s not easy for me to ignore the nay sayers, or my own self doubts, but I know it’s the only way to succeed.

COMPARING OURSELVES
I think it’s human nature to compare ourselves with others, and in so doing, we tend to compare our weaknesses with others strengths. Why not be happy with who we are and what we have been given? I ask myself this all the time. It’s hard to always be aware of the unique abilities we each have, and not be jealous of others gifts. I’m always doing this to myself, not realizing at the moment the harm it’s doing to my self confidence. I read other blogs and I’m completely blown away by the talent these other women have. I can’t help but feel less as a person and completely inadequate in every way. Comparing yourself to others is guaranteed to bring you down and make you feel worthless, therefore leading you in the opposite direction of finding true fulfillment in life.

HURRY LESS

In a world that’s ever changing and clocks that seem to be going 100 miles a minute, it’s hard for us to take time to relax and enjoy the little things. Maybe I should just speak for myself. I’m constantly trying to remind myself to slow down and relax a little, always feel like there’s something more I should be doing,  like there is never enough time in a day to accomplish it all. I’m reminded of the quote by President Ezra Taft Benson, “When we put God first, all other things fall into place.”

SEASONS OF LIFE
 I know I’m in the season of motherhood and that in and of itself is something to be grateful for and proud of. I also believe very strongly that it’s so important for us mothers to have other hobbies that don’t include wiping bums and cleaning up messes. It’s important for us to set aside time for ourselves to refine our minds and develop talents.

“Water cannot be drawn from an empty well, and if you are not setting aside a little time for what replenishes you, you will have less and less to give to others, even to your children.”
-Elder M. Russell Ballard 


I want to try harder to fulfill my purpose by allowing the truth to set me free, rising above the negativity, quit comparing myself to others, and hurry less in my season of motherhood.

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· in Inspiration· Monthly Challenge

The Importance of Validation

Validation. What is it? It’s getting feedback from others that “what I do and say matters to you or has helped you.  You think of me. You acknowledge my accomplishments. You appreciate ME.”

It’s OKAY to need a little validation sometimes. We all want to be the kind of person that doesn’t NEED validation from others. As much as I believe our happiness and confidence should come from within, I also believe that it’s OKAY to need a little love, positive words of encouragement and acknowledgment from others sometimes. We need people, God made us that way and we should embrace it. We can’t be on this journey alone and still be our best. 

 

Validation provides us with something amazing. It gives us energy, makes us happy, motivates us to keep going. We don’t have to wait around for others to give it to us though, we have the ability within ourselves to create that same kind of positive energy. Any validation from others is just icing on the cake. So when realizing this, we MUST do our best to provide validation for others and allow karma to take hold. The more we give, the more we receive. If we’re not getting the validation needed, then we must take it upon ourselves to provide it. Not desperately seek it out of others. 
 
I’ve mentioned before that sometimes I get caught up in the comparison game. There are so many wonderful bloggers and authors out there and sometimes I feel so small compared to them. But God doesn’t want us to compare. He doesn’t want us to feel like we have to be a trail blazer at all times. Although there is already so much good content out there, I shouldn’t feel like I don’t have anything unique to add. What I need to remember is that although most everything I’m doing has been done before or said before, the difference is that it hasn’t been done by ME! It’s common messages paired with MY background and personality. That’s what makes it different. I have to remind myself of this regularly. Satan is good at what he does. Just when we think we have it all together and confident in our pursuits, he’s right there to say “you’re no good so just give it up already”. 


It seems like every time I start feeling down about my blog and wanna just throw in the towel. Then is when I’ll receive a sweet reaffirming message from one of you telling me how much you’ve appreciated my blog, or how it’s inspired or motivated you in some way.  Serving others is one of THE most fulfilling endeavors in this life. 

So your messages give me that needed validation, proof that what I’m doing serves a greater purpose beyond myself. I also think it’s God’s way of keeping us from giving up on worthwhile endeavors. His hand is in all things and I’ve witnessed this time and time again. So thank you for being my supportive group of friends that keep me from giving up.

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· in happiness· Inspiration· Life of a Wannabe· Monthly Challenge· personal growth

February Challenge

14 Days of Loving Yourself
 

Thank you to my friend Heather who suggested that in honor of Valentines Day, we should focus on Self Love. I’m actually really excited about this and TOTALLY need to work on loving myself more.
To be completely honest, I lack confidence more than I’d like to admit. I struggle with self doubt due to the comparison game. I cannot seem to shake this one but determined to master it. I think most women can relate. One minute we’re feeling so confident and secure, then in walks a beautifully flawless women and suddenly you feel like the ugliest women in the room. This is what I do to myself in the blogging world.
February’s challenge couldn’t be more perfect for this time in my life. I want to love and appreciate my own unique gifts and talents. I want to be inspired by the success of others instead of allowing it to bring me down or make me feel inadequate. I wannabe CONFIDENT!
“You should never be the smartest person in the room. There’s always going to be somebody who’s smarter to learn from — and that’s a good thing.”
Jessica Alba
“Your piano teacher was right: practice does make perfect. “The best way to build confidence in a given area is to invest energy in it and work hard at it,” says Schwartz. Many people give up when they think they’re not good at a particular job or task, assuming the exertion is fruitless. But Schwartz argues that deliberate practice will almost always trump natural aptitude. If you are unsure about your ability to do something — speak in front of large audience, negotiate with a tough customer — start by trying out the skills in a safe setting. “Practice can be very useful, and is highly recommended because in addition to building confidence, it also tends to improve quality. Actually deliver the big presentation more than once before the due date. Do a dry run before opening a new store,” says Gruenfeld. Even people who are confident in their abilities can become more so with better preparation.”
-Amy Gallo
 
Do:
 
  • Practice regular positive self talk.
  • Say Exactly what you mean.
  • Stay away from negative people.
  • Let go of what you can’t control.
  • Be honest with yourself about what you know and what you still need to learn.
  • Practice doing things that aren’t always easy or comfortable.
  • Embrace failure! Failure IS success!
  • Stand tall and practice good posture.
  • Smile
  • Be grateful
  • Exercise
 
Don’t:
 
  • Worry about what other people think.
  • Be a people pleaser.
  • Speak badly about yourself.
  • Give up!
  • Be afraid to say “NO”.
  • Be afraid to say “YES”.
  • Focus on whether or not you have the ability, instead focus on the value you provide.
  • Hesitate to ask for validation if you need it. It’s OKAY to ask for honest feedback.
  • Be afraid to try new things.
  • Judge others, it’s a reflection of what you think about yourself.
 
Use the prompts below to participate in the challenge. Always use the hashtag #wannabeconfident so that we can connect with each other that way. If you have not done a Periscope before then be sure to introduce yourself and post your username in the Wannabe Balanced Facebook group.
1. Love Letter to Self (read daily)
Write a love letter to yourself. Be very detailed and write it as if God is saying these things to you. After all, God is the greatest source of love and we should be opening ourselves up to receive his love on a daily basis. So be sure to read this letter DAILY!
2. What are your Gifts and Talents? I want to hear what you know to be your God given gifts and talents.
3. Pamper Yourself, take a long bath with candles, give yourself a facial, manicure, pedicure, or go get a massage. Just do something that makes you feel good about yourself.
4. Go for a walk while saying positive affirmations. It’s always a good idea to be alone in nature and give yourself some positive self talk. Notice the beauty and thank God for all he has given you. Praise yourself for the challenges you’ve overcome, or the choices you’ve made that turned out to be a really good thing. Give yourself credit for a job well done and at the same time, thank God for guiding you and giving you the strength to endure.
5. Tell us about something you did that you’re really proud of.
6. Every time you look in the mirror today, give yourself a compliment.
7. Cultivate a morning routine that includes alone time with God. There’s nothing like the peace you find in the quiet hours of the morning. My day goes SO much better if I can wake up before the kids and have a little quiet time with God. I thank him for increasing my understanding and ask him to guide me as I go about my day.
8. What gives you purpose? What do you enjoy doing that gives you great satisfaction and fulfillment?
9. Exercise hard today! Push yourself extra hard to recieve the euphoric feeling that comes after a job well done.
10. Share a healthy habit you’d like to incorporate into your life. Could be something as simple as drinking an extra glass of water each day, or adding a new super food to your diet.
11. Enjoy the sunrise with positive affirmations. The sunrise is one of the most amazing things to witness. Most the time I’m too caught up in the book I’m reading, or my journaling that I don’t even look up to take it all in. 
12. Share a recent “Tender Mercy”. What kinds of little miracles have you witnessed in your life within the last week? Are you noticing all that God is providing for you? A lot of times God answers prayers through the voice of another person.
13. Listen to happy music and dance. Oh how I love listening to music. It’s an instant pick me up. I’ve kind of created a ritual in my house. I love to turn the fire place on, light a candle, and play some music. It instantly lifts my spirit.
14. Happy Valentines Day!!!! Share a picture that best describes “LOVE”. 
 
Please share this, heaven knows we ALL need it. Let’s help each other reach greater heights of confidence and self love. 

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· in Inspiration

The Power of Choice

“If today you are a little better than you were yesterday, then that’s enough.” –David A. Bednar.
Steven R. Covey teaches in his book that 10% of our lives are made up of things we cannot control, while the other 90% is determined by the way we respond to them.

I feel it helpful to share the things I’m learning because it creates a greater understanding for myself as I attempt to explain different concepts. It really expands my comprehension and in turn hopefully helps others in some small way. We need those constant reminders and positive affirmations. I’m not claiming to be an expert, I just love to share information that has helped me or inspires me in some way.

In Steven R. Covey’s book, he talks about a little girl and her dad having breakfast together. The daughter accidentally spills some coffee on her dad’s work shirt. He get’s upset, yells and storms upstairs to change his shirt. He comes down and realizes that she is still sad and hasn’t finished her breakfast. She ends up missing the bus so he takes her to school. When he drops her off she doesn’t say goodbye because she’s still upset.  So since he is now running late he exceeds the speed limit and gets pulled over and handed a ticket. Then of course he arrives late to work and realizes that he left his brief case at home.

We’ve all had days like this right?

It started from the spilled coffee and the way he responded. All of that could have been avoided if he had just responded in a calm, non reactive way to his daughter. After all, it was an innocent mistake. His response is what determined the rest of his day.
Now I want to share with you how this relates to ME. A few months ago I wasn’t having the best week and now I can admit that it was because of  the way I chose to respond to certain situations.
Basically, Sean and I had a conversation and I chose to get my feelings hurt and I let that affect the way I felt for a good 2-3 days. It affected the way I treated Sean AND the kids. It quickly became a downward spiral because I allowed it to.
We have all had those days where nothing seems to go right. Ninety percent of the time we have brought it upon ourselves. It’s the cold hard truth. Hopefully through out our lives and with a little practice, we will get better at this principle. It’s not an easy one to master that’s for sure.  I’m 34 years old and I still act like a child sometimes.
How many times have you ever said “Ugh…You’re making me so mad!” I say that to my kids sometimes and I hate to admit what I’m actually teaching them.
 That others have control over their actions and emotions. That it’s okay to blame others for the way they’re feeling. It’s simply not true!  Nobody can MAKE us feel anything. We ALLOW those feelings to take control. I’m not saying we should all be to the point where we never get mad or hurt. We should feel those feelings but not allow them to take over and consume us.  We should feel them, be hurt, be sad, be mad, but with the self control to remain calm on the outside until we work through those feelings on the inside. We need not fall into the blame game…

“Oh I’m no good at anything because my parents didn’t provide opportunity.” Or, “We were really poor growing up, so I couldn’t afford to go to college, so therefore I can’t find a good job.” Or, “I’m really overweight because we were taught really bad eating habits growing up.”
There are so many excuses we could come up with. Sometimes it’s easiest to blame others for our circumstances. We need to get really good at this principle, and defining where the true problem lies…within ourselves.
It’s hard being a mom, because we are still learning and feel pressure to be that perfect example. 
Even this morning on our way to school, I felt really bad because I snapped at Lily for getting gum out of my purse. I hate when she does that because then all the other kids want gum and she can’t have gum at school anyway. I was like, “Lily, stop it!”
She was wondering why I was getting so mad, and I was like, “oh sorry Lily!” 
Its so hard to be a good example. But I want to be the kind of example of someone who is humble enough to admit fault and say sorry.
We have been given a lot of control over our lives, 90%, that’s a lot!!!

I think it comes down to 3 things:
1.    Being humble. Accepting fault and constructive criticism.
2.     Being proactive. Take action. Stop with the excuses. We need to build the kind of life we want.  We can create that with our 90%. It’s a matter of choice. Its how we use our time and how we choose to respond to things. Stop making excuses. Who says you aren’t talented, gifted, beautiful, creative, outgoing, smart, ambitious, determined, compassionate? Maybe you just haven’t learned all you need to learn. Get educated. Overcome those obstacles. Stop putting labels on ourselves.
3.     Being grateful. Anytime you feel like things are falling apart, in any situation, you can ALWAYS find the positive. It’s just a matter of looking for it and being grateful for the lessons within the trials. Enjoy the journey.
We have the choice to respond positively to any situation. It’s a life long process. But it’s good to have these reminders and work at being better than we were yesterday.

 Be sure to follow me on Periscope for regular messages via live video streaming! I love interacting with you all this way so leave comments!!! www.periscope.tv/crystalescobar

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· in 52 Weeks of Balance Project· Health· Inspiration· Life of a Wannabe· List's and Schedules· Mom Stuff· My Thoughts and Feelings· Uncategorized· Weight Loss

December Challenge

Wannabe Balanced Challenge
This month I want to really focus on being balanced and enjoying every moment. Each day we will post a picture on our Instagram and or Facebook accounts that applies to the daily prompt. Just post a picture on facebook/instagram each day. Elaborate a little and share your thoughts or a positive quote to go with your picture. Use the hashtag #wannabebalanced so that we can easily find each others posts and support one another by liking and commenting. If you’re new to our challenges then I’d highly recommend you start with our Wannabe Fearless Challenge first.


Instead of stressing out and over doing it on the treats, take one step toward staying healthy physically and mentally this month. Get FREE daily inspiration from me, your fellow Wannabe Balanced Mom. 

How it works:

1. Use the daily prompts to inspire you. 

2. Inspire US with your pics, and or thoughts.
 
3. Share on Facebook, Instagram, or even Periscope using the hashtag #wannabebalanced (November Wannabe Fearless challenge had 1k people talking about it!)

4. Encourage balance in others with likes + thoughtful comments. (most supportive tribe of women here)

5. Share this post on Facebook, or share this picture on Instagram so you can help your friends and family stay a little more balanced this month. Also, Join our Facebook group Wannabe Balanced for more support and inspiration throughout the year. 


  1. ·      Selfie: Tell us a little about you.
  2. ·      What are you reading?
  3. ·      Push yourself really hard in your fitness routine. Sweat!!!
  4. ·      Focus on mindfulness today. Enjoy the present, practice mindful listening and eating.
  5. ·      Go on a long run.
  6. ·      Write in your journal.
  7. ·      Meal prep for the week.
  8. ·      Call a friend or send a hand written letter.
  9. ·      De-clutter a space in your house.
  10. ·      Spend 10 minutes meditating. Eyes closed, doing and thinking about NOTHING. Set your timer.
  11. ·      Write out some positive affirmations today.
  12. ·      Make a colorful salad.
  13. ·      Wake up early.
  14. ·      Do something different with your husband.
  15. ·      Share a childhood memory.
  16. ·      Share a healthy treat.
  17. ·      Do something festive and fun with the kids.
  18. ·      Say a 10 minute prayer.
  19. ·      Do a service project with your kids.
  20. ·      Show us a DIY project.
  21. ·      Wrap presents
  22. ·      Have a family movie night with pop corn and hot cocoa.
  23. ·      Get bundled up and play outside with your kids.
  24. ·      Share a tradition.
  25. ·      Show us your Christmas morning aftermath.
  26. ·      Do Yoga.
  27. ·      Write down your game plan for 2016
  28. ·      Go to bed early
  29. ·      Listen to a podcast
  30. ·      Best bit of today.
  31. ·      Last moment of 2015

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· in business building tips· Inspiration

Wannabe Fearless Challenge

15 Days of Overcoming Fear! 
 
Most people are afraid of speaking in front of people and being on camera. My goal with this challenge is to help you overcome that fear by stepping out of your comfort zone and doing daily live videos via Facebook, Periscope, or YouTube.
You can find me at on YouTube at www.youtube.com/wannabebalanced
 

 Now Let’s Get Started

 

Day 1. Introduce yourself briefly
Day 2. Tell us your hobbies and or talents.
Day 3. What are your long-term goals and passions?
Day 4. Tell a story of when you pushed yourself to do something, even though it was scary.
Day 5. Share a helpful tip for moms.
Day 6. What are your fears?
Day 7. Tell us about your favorite motivational speaker and or book?
Day 8. Share one of your life altering experiences and what you learned from it.
Day 9. Give us a tour of your home.
Day 10. What is your favorite, can’t live without, product?
Day 11. Share your favorite recipe.
Day 12. What is keeping you from fulfilling your dreams?
Day 13. What are some of your greatest accomplishments?
Day 14. Tell us how you met your husband.
Day 15. Share an embarrassing moment.
 
If you would like to join in on this challenge and receive incredible support and followers, then let me know by leaving a comment below, or go join our Facebook group called Wannabe Balanced. Everyone is welcome!!!

Just be sure to use the hashtag #wannabefearless as part of your title and share your videos on Facebook and Twitter. I would love to support you through this challenge by watching your videos. I did this challenge last year with a great group of women and it was amazing to witness the growth in just 15 days. 
 
Reasons why Live Video is so great:
 
*Huge time saver! Doing live video is much faster than blog posts. Being a mom of 4 small children doesn’t really allow much extra time. So I like to utilize video mostly and blog when I can. 
 
*Great way to practice your speaking skills. It’s a little nerve racking at first, but I can see how much I’ve improved over the past year since starting. 
 
*If you are building a brand or business, it’s a great way to teach and share information in a more personal way. People can SEE you and hear your voice. It humanizes you. 
 
*Since you are live and people are able to comment, it just feels like you’re face-timing with friends. You can get instant feedback and answer questions on the spot. 

*It’s great self talk and a way to voice your positive affirmations and at the same time lifting others.

So come on everyone! Let’s work at overcoming fear one day at a time.

UPDATE!!! Just did my 200th Periscope!!!J Here’s a quick look back over the past 6 months of scoping! I started Periscoping as a way to overcome the fear of speaking in front of people, develop better communication skills and to just share the messages of my heart. I can honestly say that I DID overcome my fear and have seen a huge improvement in my overall speaking skills. Periscope has been great practice and I appreciate you all who have been so supportive throughout this growing process!!!


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Stay Connected!

Welcome!

Thank you for stopping by! I love connecting with other like minded women. This website is all about how to become the best version of yourself as you strive for balance in motherhood, business, and overall personal growth. Let’s work together! Email me at crystal@escoweb.net

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